Parents suffer from separation anxiety too

As our babies and kids go through the different developmental phases we often come across separation anxiety. It’s normal for little ones to feel separation anxiety. I remember reading lots about it when Big Munch was around 9 months old. I’ll be away from my two girls and Mr.H soon as I head off to the Mom 2.0 blogger conference in Orlando. I know I have mixed feelings about being away. So, what about the parents and their own separation anxiety?  

Are they going to be OK? It’s a question we ask ourselves as parents each day. It could be the nursery drop-off or saying bye at nap-time. We can’t constantly watch our kids and have to trust that they will be OK. However, they’re so little and it’s natural that we worry about them. That’s why I’m sure it’s normal for us parents to suffer from separation anxiety too. We’re only human right?

Photo by Katrina Campbell Photography

Trusting others…A big part of parental separation anxiety is knowing that our kids are being well looked after. We have to start trusting other grown ups to look after our precious babies. We have to trust our children’s independence. It’s something I want my girls to feel. I never wanted them to be super-clingy babies as I knew I’d be going back to work after maternity leave. For the first time, me and Mr H went away together on our own and to another country. We knew our girls would be fine staying the weekend at my Mum’s. It still felt strange knowing that they wouldn’t be able to see both of us over the weekend. 

Missing out…Kids are constantly developing. When we have to leave them at nursery or childcare we don’t always get to see their new tricks first time round. Parents can feel like they’re missing out. It’s like parenthood FOMO.  Not being together doesn’t mean not sharing special moments at other times. In fact being part can make us value the family hang out time we enjoy together. 
Getting used to it…I remember my parents working long hours when I was little. Working is part of life. It means we will be apart from our kids. Everyone’s getting used to doing their own thing during the day. As a mum I need my time out and I’m glad my two girls are getting used to seeing their mummy go off to work or her events at the weekends. I hope see this will encourage their own independence when they’re older. 

Will they be OK without us? We are their parents and they need us everyday. We’re their ultimate comfort blanket. I worry about if or when they feel upset or may hurt themselves and need a cuddle. All they might want at that moment is their mummy or daddy. What I’ve learnt is that kids can be really adaptable. They find their different sources of support. They also quickly move onto the next activity. 

Tearful goodbyes…Last week it was tears all round. Toddler Munch has started a new nursery and she just didn’t want to go in. Usually she’s OK with nursery but seeing her so upset brought out the tears in me too. I felt bad leaving her knowing she wasn’t in the mood for hanging out with new grown ups and kids. For the first time I felt a rush of hardcore mum guilt. I was leaving her when she was really upset but I had to go to work. Knowing how busy she would soon be at nursery helped my separation anxiety. 

Everyday reunions…One thing that distracts me from separation anxiety during the day is knowing we will be back together again. You’ve got to love the excited hello’s and cuddles at the nursery pick up. When I come home from my trip I’m excited about walking in through the front door and being greeted with some serious hugs from my two girls. 

Do you think parents suffer rom separation anxiety? What helps children to feel OK when they’re away from their parents? Any tips for me when I’m away from my children next week? Let me know what you think too. 

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Top tips on looking after yourself

Where are the weeks going? There is always lots to do so it’s important we take time to look after ourselves. If we look after ourselves then I believe we’re also able to feel more confident and focused.

It was pretty cool sharing my top tips for looking after yourself to an inspiring crowd at the Lucky Things Meet Up in January. I wrote these top tips especially for the event. As promised, I wanted to share these on the blog too. I know I’ll be looking back at this list throughout the year! Here you go… Continue reading

Parenting: Top tips for looking after twin babies

When people find out we did IVF many of them asked if there was a high chance of us having twins. There wasn’t due to the type of Natural IVF we pursued. So we always knew that if our IVF was successful, there would be one bubba. Quite a few of our friends have twin babies or they might be expecting twins. So I thought I’d round up a few tips from some of the mama bloggers out there with first hand experience. By coincidence, this week Beyoncé and Jay-Z announced their twins news. Thanks to Katie, Hayley and Shannon who shared their top tips on looking after twin babies (and yourselves as parents). Continue reading

Top tips on getting organised from the last Mothers Meeting of 2016

I’m always interested in how others get organised. Sometimes we talk about if there is such a thing. Does anyone feel 100% organised all of the time? It’s also about juggling rather than having everything sorted in a military style. I guess we also decide how long our to-do lists are, but there’s the daily and weekly tasks as well as our other mini life projects (family, us, or work-related). At the last Mothers Meeting of 2016, I asked the panel about their top tips for getting organised. Cherry Healey and Jenny Scott hosted the chat with Anna from Mother Pukka, Zoe from Dress Like A Mum, Steph from Don’t Buy Her Flowers, Hollie, creator of Yes Mum cards, Clemmie from Mother of Daughters and Clemmie Telford from Mother of All Lists. Here’s what they had to say… Continue reading

Parenting: What does confidence look like for children by Livvy Gormally, Let’s Ask Livvy (part 1)

On Lucky Things blog, we talk a fair bit about confidence. It’s something that comes and goes and impacts all of us. So what about confidence for our children? I met Livvy Gormally a few months ago when she shared her top tips on managing routines. Livvy is a children’s behaviour expert, applied behaviour analysis (ABA) consultant and parenting coach. I asked her to share some top tips on how we can help our kids to feel confident. Over to Livvy for part 1 of her guest post… Continue reading

What have these ladies learnt from 2016? Mothers Meeting Confidence Conference

It’s pretty important to get people together. The last Mothers Meeting of 2016 brought together lots of talented ladies at London’s The Town Hall Hotel.  Not just a community of old and new faces but also the amazing entrepreneurs at the Christmas market. As the end of 2016 approaches  a lot of us are thinking about the year behind us. We’re thinking about the ups and downs, the ins and outs of how we got through it and what we have planned for 2017 (crikey, where has the year gone?).

At this Mothers Meeting Confidence Conference we heard from a panel about what they have learnt from 2016. They also shared their highlights. Cherry Healey hosted the chat on the sofa featuring Anna from Mother Pukka, Zoe from Dress Like A Mum, Steph from Don’t Buy Her Flowers, Hollie, creator of Yes Mum cards, Clemmie from Mother of Daughters and Clemmie Telford from Mother of All Lists.

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Top tips on kids’ routines from children’s behaviour expert Livvy Gormally, Lets Ask Livvy

As a parent, I know I will forever have questions about whether I’m doing the right thing when looking after, nurturing and teaching my two girls about everyday life. It was fab seeing Livvy Gormally from Let’s Ask Livvy talk about all things parenting at the Mothers Meeting at Shoreditch House in London. From sleep routines, weaning and navigating tantrums, we all hit some critical parenting topics. We also talked a lot about how to encourage our babies and children to follow routines or adapt to changes in everyday plans. The Mothers Meeting crowd in the house also had the chance to ask Livvy lots of questions.img_8779 Continue reading

Why you will always be our Baby Munch – from baby to toddler

What can I say the past 18 months have flown by. About a month ago, Baby Munch started walking. I loved it that she learned to dance before walking. That’s my girl! When you aren’t planning to have any more children (or aren’t able to) having your last baby generates lots of interesting feelings.

So good news for Baby Munch, I mean Toddler Munch, as she’s loving this promotion and next phase of her life. I interviewed her recently over a bowl of rice cakes on why she’s loving life as a toddler:img_6880

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Time to Shine: Celebrating those winning moments as a parent – Guest post by Kimberly

Hey everyone, my pal Kimberly is back! You may have seen her cool post on confidence tips she picked up from a career in TV. Thanks to everyone who read her post and left a comment. Here’s Kimberly’s second post for Lucky Things (I’m secretly hoping there will be many more..). Parenting isn’t supposed to be straightforward. We also can’t put pressure on ourselves to be perfect parents and bring up ‘perfect’ children.

Over to the lovely Kimberly who tells us about those precious winning moments as a parent… Continue reading

Seven things I loved about The Mama Squad Assemble…

_MG_6144I first came across Mama Squad on Instagram. It’s a community set up by the lovely Donna. It’s all about celebrating mamas and supporting each other. Donna organised The Mama Squad Assemble so ladies could hang out, enjoy some me-treat time, learn about stuff and go home with a bit of inspiration. Even better as Mama Squad Assemble featured a talk by Grace Timothy of Mum Face. Grace has worked in the beauty journalism business for over 10 years including a role as Contributing Beauty Editor at Glamour. Yep, she really does know her stuff when it comes to looking good and more importantly feeling good.

Taking an afternoon off as mummy can feel like a big thing. When you have time to yourself, you feel like doing something worthwhile. Want to hear more about what we got up to? Here’s seven things I loved about the Mama Squad Assemble… Continue reading